Sunday, January 12, 2020

In the News

Given that all politicians and their friends  and federal 'workers' are absolved from any crimes they commit, and because today's population are so ignorant they don't understand any of the laws anyhoo,  federal judges have removed ALL laws from the books with the exception of those involving child or animal abuse.  Go nuts folks.  No penalty.

Sex education in 2nd grade now involves 2 volunteers of same or opposite sex to demonstrate anal sex in front of the class. Every Friday.

Remember that Gropey Joe Biden wrote an Executive Order on Jan 25, 2021 eliminating pedophilia from the criminal code.  Sex between young and older (Like Macron and his wife-he was 15 she 30 something) is now promoted as not only permissible but preferable. 10 year old Tommy is quite excited and so is 30 yr old teacher Jennifer Dominatutor.  Parents need not be notified.

Female liberal comedian tweets she will give a BJ to anyone who votes for Bernie Sanders. everyone tweets back "That's a great reason to vote for Trump".

Jane Fonda travels to Iran, begs mullahs to be put in control of their ICBM arsenal as well as GPS coordinates to Mar-A-Lago.

Nana Pelosi charges Vladamir Putin with verbal sexual assault after he makes profanity riddled prank call. He was actually insulting her but she took it the other way around.  Must be this is how most men talk to her.

Virginia passes bill requiring all residents to swear allegiance to islam and acquire at least one goat as a pet/lover.

California passes bill requiring all residents to electronically transfer all monetary assets to the state.

Supreme Court Chief Justice Roberts reveals he has threesomes with Barack and Michelle Obama

Gweneth Paltrow sells an over-priced candle that she claims smells like a woman's genitals. It quickly sells out.

James Comey announces presidential run.

Michael Moore and Bob DiNero at a loss for words when asked what they think about Donald Trump being president for another 5 years.

Climate experts finally admit it's all Bullshit and laugh like hell on the Jimmy Kimmel and other late night shows.

Eric Holder is put in charge of reforming the FBI

Pope Francis demands all Christian clergy convert to islam.

The Hildebeast is to be Sainted by Pope Francis and the Vatican later this month.

Greta Thu... Ah who gives a damn.

Feral cats are reportedly forming gangs and plotting to overthrow the US Government by force.

Democrat men still trying to figure out how to use tampons.

AOC claims she is afraid to have kids.  Conservatives breath a sigh of relief.

Adam Schiff attacks President Trump with rubber knife.  No one is harmed.

Mitch McConnell secretly puts super glue on Chuckie Shumer's glasses nose support.  He can no longer move them from the end of his nose.

All democrat women offer free BJ's to anyone voting democrat.  No one is interested except Mike Moore.

Slow news day but some of this stuff was actually in the news.


  1. There's a lot to love about this post, but Paltrow's Candle stands out. It costs $75.

    Nancy and Hillary are just as nasty and cost far more, which is worse? I don't know, it's all one and the same heaving mass of degeneracy, nihilism, greed and corruption.

    That in mind, we'd expect Lucifer to raise up a more compelling set of, errr, leaders than Octo Bernie, Groper, Buttjug and the Fake Indian. It's like the infernal overlord hit some kind of talent deficit after the CRONE's epic fail.

    Stand steady, MAGA 2020.

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    _____ The Defecrat's Inspiration _______

    Nothing beats the taste of Anal Fudge
    Licked off the member of a leftist judge!

    ~ Saint Disgustine

  4. Kid, you are a very clever, very astute, very funny man. In fact I thnk you are The Jonathan Swift of Our Time.

    Please keep 'em comia.'

  5. Harry and Meghan thumb Thir Noses at Queen Elizabeth, Divest Themselves of All Wealth and Property, then run off to join a Hippie Commune to Live as Mendicants in the deserts of Kookifornya

    [PREDICTION: two months from now Meghan, the Middle-Aged Mulatto, will LEAVE poor Harry the Humble to write a pointedly nasty Tell All Book about the Royal Family,, make millions in the process, then try resume her former Life as an International trollop and Adventuress. She will not b successful, nd will doubtless come to Bad End. Poor little Archie, who was never more than PROP in this sad Commedy of Errors, having already fulfilled his purpose, will die soon of a mysterious, undiagnosed Crib Ailment. His remains will ndergo immediate crematio, and his ashes will be scattered in an undisclosed location.]

    1. Well, good for them Franco. Also sounds like a reasonable prediction.

  6. ___ DAMAGE CONTROL? ___

    Too that Queen Elizabeth
    ___ no longer has the power
    To have a brazen tart like Markle
    ___ murdered in the Tower.

    She managed to dispose
    ___ of Harry's Momma
    Neatly and completely
    ___ 'midst high Drama!

    The Queen' s been wise
    ___ though not to press her luck
    Despite her grandson's
    ––– tendency to suck!

    ~ Kitty Panne

  7. LOL, I can't figure out the real news from the fake news, so I am just going to assume its all true... just like a good li'l CNN viewer. All 12 of them... as they stroll by the large TV in the airport concourse. I just wish I had a wooden nickel for every time Vladamir Putin makes a profanity riddled prank call.

    1. Thanks Much Mr Blade. If it's not true it ain't far off.