Wednesday, March 3, 2021

News !

Biden administration backs plan to replace all current medical doctors with black people who can't do math.

US Capitol building sustains 107th attack in as many days.

Biden backs drop in minimum wage to 3.40 per hour.

All union teachers to retire immediately on full pay, essentially taking rest of their lives as snow days.

Whistleblower to blow whistle at next SOTU scheduled for January, 2029 at the earliest.

Everything that non-black people do, say, or think is declared racist.

Democrats cheer rising Misery Index which was originally created under Jimmy Carter to detail how much he sucked as President.  Pelosi holds news conference to declare that this important measure of America's health is finally rising again.  Pelosi nominated for Emmy, Nobel peace Prize, and Honorary Golden Globes awards.

Joe Biden to present Snoop Dog with Congressional Medal of Freedom.

Baltimore student at top half of his class with 0.13 grade average after passing 3 classes in 4 years. "Tiffany France thought her son would receive his diploma this coming June. But after four years of high school, France just learned, her 17-year-old must start over. He’s been moved back to ninth grade." (Looks like real one?)


Las Vegas sold to Kim Jong Un. All casinos converted into Comfort Women Resorts.

World Leaders doing prank calls to White House all day long, every day. Joe Biden seen running down street thinking White House Refrigerator was running on Pennsylvania Ave. - other staff members frantically looking for a Prince Albert supposedly trapped in a can.

Reparations estimated to cost 347 trillion dollars by CBO.  Joe Biden holds press conference, says 347 dollars, er 347 hundred dollars, or he clarifies that 1,347 roasting chestnuts is nothing we can't afford then begins talking about he and Jill's Christmas plans then asks if anyone brought presents with them.

Anonymous whistleblower doctor testifies that Joe Biden has black eyes, lifeless eyes, like a doll's eyes.

Daily shots of Covid Vaccine now required to gain up to 68% chance of immunity.

National Guard troops stationed in parking garage at Capitol building forced to drink "Blood of Satan' concoction. 




Monday, March 1, 2021

Couple Randoms for Old People

 Man, Time just keeps on tickin tickin tickin. Into the future.



Here's a couple ideas:

Open a business that sells products for households with no kids.

Nothing sold is child proof.  In fact, all products are guaranteed to injure children if they even look at them.  Lighters that all ya gotta do is pull the trigger for it to light without holding some button down and hopping on one leg at the same time while screaming Light You SOB !

How about a Board Game with these squares:

Medical: find out what ailment you're falling out of bed with today.  Have to land on a Medical Services square to get it fixed and pay whatever the price is.  While you have it you can only move 6 squares forward or back.

Blind Date: Pull 3 cards off the blind date stack to find out if your date is rich or not and what kind of baggage they might have.   No insurance, 5 dogs that need walked, alcoholic, scary friends, rich (yaa), heir to large estate (double yaa), hugely in debt,  hugely in debt to the mob, has a politician as family member who is democrat, can't drive, operates a Raccoon and Opossum Rescue, only wants sex twice a year... who the heck knows.  Each item of baggage costs you money until you land on the Dump Em square.  Each item of good stuff (like them being rich) awards you money with each toss of the die, but don't land on the Get Dumped square or the good times are over.

Booze: land on the booze square and take a real drink from your alcoholic beverage choices.

Strip: land on this square and shock your guests by taking off a piece of clothing.  Guests have to pay you to have you put it back on. 

Kissing: land here and kiss the person of the opposite sex closest to you or anyone who will let you.

DotGov: Land here and have to deal with a government agency. You must sit out 3 turns and pay $50 fee.

Spouse Choice:  Land here and get some busy work to take care of while everyone else plays without you until you finish.

Maybe you have some more ideas.



Friday, February 26, 2021

News

Amy Barrett said she voted outside the constitution over the PA election suit because she thought she was supposed to take Ruth Ginsberg's place.  That's what John Roberts told her when she showed up for work.  Clarence Thomas screams he is "fit to be tied"  Neil Gorsuch and Brett Kavanaugh call for Lindsey Graham to call this action out as a Sham - A Big Sham!


Facebook bans everyone outside of most facebook employees and ISIS vermin
Twitter follows suit but bans most of their own employees as well.  Stocks for both companies rally.

CNN reports Nana Pelosi caught having sex with Jerry Nadler, all news presenters immediately vomit live on camera when realizing what they just said and all go home on personal leave for a length of time TBD (to be defined).

Biden pays Xi Jinpingpong 10 billion to let him win at a game of Chinese checkers on Facebook live.  Unfortunately for Joe, the broadcast was censored due to facebook's latest community standards rules.

Markie Zukerburg and Jackie Dorsey show up for Congressional hearing, immediately moon the congress members in attendance, laugh like hell and leave while Ted Cruz screams "There will be Consequences!".  Lindsey Graham just got a far away smiley look on his face.



From CNBC - Anonymous 'Trader' says "Market may crash, look out below, and Oh woe is us !".



$15 minimum wage enacted, followed by wage increases among union members whose contracts are based on minimum wage causing huge inflation spiral. Minimum wage earners demand $25  minimum wage.  AOC demands $50 minimum wage to counteract the next inflation spiral. Warren Buffet thinks things are spiraling out of control.




Lindsey Graham demands more subpoenas to get to the bottom of the suspected erroneous "Steele Dossier". Plans for indictments by April 32nd 2041.


Second graders in this California school forced into mutual masturbation sessions during on-line zoom classes.  Teachers secretly recording sessions to sell to child porn movie makers.



Bradley (Chelsea) Manning says has only been approached for sex by other transgenders, says they make him nauseous to look at, says he plays Hank Willliam's tune "I'm so Lonely" [I could cry] over and over in his big empty New York apartment.  Also says he is a lot prettier than "that fake Jenner chick".

All statues of famous Americans to be replaced by statues of Joe Stalin, Pol Pot, Xi Jiningpong, and Vladimir Putin.

Chess Declared Racist because White moves first (real one)

Mr and Mrs Potato Head now just sick twisted Potato Heads (nuther real one)

White House spokesperson Jen Psaki now bringing her favorite doll - Raggedy Ann, to all pressers.




White House Doctor says Joe Biden's teleprompter has been diagnosed with Dementia !

Congress passses 3 trillion "Unity Bill" directed to be used only for whole body tattoos for everyone and gender retransformation surgeries for anyone too weak to resist.

Tune in next week !  Or not.

Monday, February 15, 2021

Out of the Darkness and Into the Light

Well golly, imagine my surprise to find a tune I like released in 2018.




Out of the darkness
Into the light
Let it go easy
Not without a fight
No matter the distance
And how far I run
You'll always be missing
When the day is done

Hey, love, the truth is that I really know why
I just let the wild wind decide
Cause I go blind when I try to find you
Yes I go blind when I try to find you
But I'll find you

So what's your conviction?
What is your truth?
What's your prediction?
To know for what use?
But we make our own dreams
It's perfectly clear
I still present the taste
When you're not there

Oh, hey, love, the truth is that I really know why
I just let the wild wind decide
Cause I go blind when I try to find you
Yeah, I go blind when I try to find you
Yeah, I go blind when I try to find you
Yeah, I go blind when I try to find you
But I'll find you

I'll find you

Friday, January 29, 2021

It Occurs To Me on This Climate Crisis

Well, it should be obvious, but you know it occurred to me that it are the young climate crazed critters who are causing most of the problem if you believe in the CO2 monster under your bed thing.

The young people are running around on the soccer pitches, jogging, constantly bitching and moaning about the latest social justice scam,  heading to the gym, (but now with gyms closed, to the basement to 'crush it' on their $50 a month Peleton machine subscriptions),  expelling Massive amounts of CO2 into the beautiful clean air created by Donald J Trump.  And let's not forget the 24/7 sexual escapades !  PUFF PUFF PUFF !  Massive CO2 output (and STDs as an added benefit).

Kids, slow it down, you're destroying the planet !  And AOC with that huge maw she has is likely one of the biggest offenders.  Typical. Typical.

Ok, back to what you were doing.

Friday, January 22, 2021

Some Space Stuff

Click on the pics or become one of Joe Biden's food tasters.


 Medulla Nebula





Milky Way Galaxy Ring





A Little Dust





Trillions of Miles, Billions of Years





More Stuff for Adrienne's Jewelry Box