Apparently, Mustang has Agents Everywhere. Who Knew ?

To say any more would reveal too much and endanger the lives of agents and their beloved cats all over.

Anyway - Enjoy a guest post by Mustang !

... A conversation between Mayor Bill Di Blasio and his underling chief of staff.  Place: The Mayor’s Office, NYC.

C/S:   Good morning sir.  How was the ride in from your mayoral mansion?

Mayor:        I’m not in the mood for small talk this morning.  What’s going on this morning?

C/S:   According to personnel, we’ve run critically short of illegal aliens.  We’re down to around 2,000 in all five Burroughs.

Mayor:        How in the hell did that happen?

C/S:   Well, as you know, we recently had the Cinco de Mayo celebrations all over the city, so along with that was a lot of wild parties, which always ends up with knife fights, gun fights, and the occasional broken bottle of Dos XX thrust into the chest of an occasional bystander.  Those dopes in the NYPD shot a few, too, during a robbery attempt in Queens.  The body count was well over 10,000 city-wide at last tally.

Mayor:        Damn.  Well, we can’t have that.

C/S:   No sir, but that’s just the way those people are.  Given time, though, they’ll repopulate themselves.

Mayor:        No, I mean we can’t afford to lose so many illegal aliens.  We’ve got to replace them, and quick.

C/S:   Replace them?  How?

Mayor:        Let’s get someone to call Mexico and a few of those other shit holes in central America.  Ask them to send up more.

C/S:   We can’t do that, sir.  You know what a sieve some of our departments are to the press.  If word got out about us asking for more illegals ... well, it would only add fire to Trump’s damn tweet machine.

Mayor:        Yeah ... well, then, how about we ask New Jersey and Delaware to send us some?

C/S:   We already owe them for the last two shipments; I think they sent us 5,000 each.  Eventually, when it gets closer to Election Day, they’ll want them back.

Major:         Damn.  Yeah, you’re right.  It’s a shame, too, because those illegals from Jersey are quality stock.  Well-fed from the tax system, and crazy irritable.  Almost the perfect illegal, if you know what I mean.

C/S:   I think we just have to wait for the re-population thing to occur among those that remain.

Mayor:        No, that’s out of the question.  Besides, with only 2,000 left ... what if another damn Hispanic celebration pops up?  We could lose them all in one fell swoop.  We’ve got to come up with another way to replenish our stock.

C/S:   Well, you know, if you pay me per diem, I could drive down to Mexico, or Texas, or to Canada and bring some back in my van.  Forty or fifty trips could do it.

Mayor:        No, no that won’t work.  Besides, the last time you took a trip like that, your per diem bill was well over two million dollars and I had to take that out of Chirlane’s household money.  I didn’t get laid for a week.  Snap!  I know, let’s release illegals from our jails and prisons.  We’ve got what .... around 20,000 or so convicted of serious felonies, another 10,000 awaiting trial, and I think another 5,000 that are pending plea bargaining.  Let’s do that!

C/S:   Um.  Sir.  Release criminals?  Seriously?  Won’t they just kill, rape, rob, mug, deal, and assault more?

Mayor:        Small price to pay.  Let’em go.

C/S:   Small price to pay for what, Mr. Mayor?

Mayor:        Damn you’re slow.  We can’t have a sanctuary city without someone getting sanctuary, can we?  Who ever heard of a sanctuary city that didn’t offer sanctuary?  Let’em go.  Today.  Right now.

C/S:   Won’t that damage our chances of getting more federal money to feed the homeless, though?

Mayor:        Naw ... those dopes in Washington will never figure it out.  Let’s just release the criminals and then, if anyone finds out, we’ll just resort to our favorite strategy of ignoring questions from the press.  That was a joke ... we never get any questions from the press.  Ha ha ha.