Folks ! Men, Women, People from All Generics ! We have to get Trump out of office ! 150 million Americans are killed by gun violence every year in this country !
Now look folks, B-Be-Bu-That guy who was my last boss and I, worked really hard for Americans and we had No Scandals whatsoever. 100% Scandal Free for 10 long years of our administration !
People have been saying I don't know what state I'm in when I do these rallies. Watch this. I'll close my eyes and spin this globe and place my finger on the globe Exactly where we are. There ya go, Antarctica is exactly where we are right now. No scandals in Antarctica during Billy and My administration from 2001 to 2009.
Folks, I'm looking forward to appointing the first African-American woman to the Senate. And if you didn't know, I am running for the Senate right now and I need your vote and if you don't want to vote for me, vote for Joe Biden.
Folks, this Corona beer virus is a big Fruckin deal and Trump's not doing anything about it. If I were in the White House, I'd go out on the back porch,shoot a couple rounds out of a shotgun and that would take care of it !
Now, what I'm going to say next is Super Incredibly Important. (Silence............)
Folks, when Barney and I were president, I negotiated serious trade deals with Mao Zedong. He was so afraid of me he was literally shaking in the rectangular office. I told him if he didn't increase the trade imbalance between the US and China, I'd take him behind the gym and beat the crap out of him. Afterwards the US was sending 1000 Billion dollars to China that would ever come back. That was me folks and of course the president, Michael. You can think us for that.
Now, here is one of my videos from my early years.
OMG, if I see another Bloomberg ad I'm gonna puke. And then there's Biden. WTF, send them both to a home.
ReplyDeleteLSP- UN Real. The pukes who are gunning to be the PRESIDENT. Un Real.
DeleteKid - you have a real talent for writing comedy. Seriously!! This is hilarious.
ReplyDeleteThanks A !
DeleteMore to come.
She's right, Kid. I've often said it, myself. Youse is a very funny man when writing satire.
DeleteThank You Franco !
DeleteCrosby was a modern master of Malapropism
ReplyDeleteBut I like the original Mrs. Malaprop better.
"You lead the way, and i will precede you" Yu know THAT kind of stuff.
Norm was who came to mind Franco but yea I like all that stuff.
DeleteWhen that congoleum goes to the congressional they don't tell nothin' but lies to the Father Congester.
DeleteSo, when he tells them to do Penzance in order to get Absolut all they get out of it is a noxious heartache.
Tnat ain't no way to get Starvation. It's the express route to Partition, an' that ain't no good thi[ng.
Could anybody but me translate my failed attempt to amuse y'all?
DeleteI thught i did a pretty good job of talking in genuine Malapropisms, but, apparently I didn't.
DeleteSORRY!
Franco, just saw this Norm Crosby imitation. Good Stuff ! Ha.
DeleteAdrienne's right, this IS hilarious!
ReplyDelete"Folks, I'm looking forward to appointing the first African-American woman to the Senate"
But, seriously, this reminds me...on FOX this morning, I saw a black young woman say she was voting for Biden because he said he's going to pick a black female for the Supreme Court. DID HE? OMG.
And are we EVER going to get people in positions because of MERIT again? Sure, black female Justice, why not? if she's brilliant, loves the Constitution, and wouldn't give Biden a glass of water if he was on fire!
Or whatever that expression is :-)
\
Great job, Kid....as usual, the points are all SO FUNNY!!! No wonder BARNEY won't support him!!! HA!
Z, hahaha. Love your comment. Did you know Biden actually said "Appoint to the Senate" ? hahah
DeleteAppoint a black person to..... And dang, that is the way a lot of young people think, even back in my day when education was supposed to be halfway decent. These days? The kids probably can't wait until a tranny or Drag Queen gets elected to the White House. You know for diversity sake.
This is the predicament we are in. The Kids don't know who or what Merits being in any given position. Obama did as much as humanly possible to destroy America and there are a great number of morons that would vote him back in if it was possible. Yowsah.
"YOWSAY" is right, Kid! (i love that word).
ReplyDeleteNo, I DID NOT know he'd say he'd APPOINT someone to the SENATE....and he looks like he's won S Carolina tonight :-) OY!
But, of course, as all of us say, if our media was HONEST and published all these stupid things he says... Oh, but wait; nobody'd understand they were stupid and why anyway, would they... YOWSAH
Z, Yea, actually said it. He's a laugh a minute.
DeleteZ, PS - yea, they're walking around saying "Aw, that's just ole Joe"..
DeleteLooks like the Dems are starting to panic... now getting on board with Biden. This should be a real hoot....once again Kid, you have done some great stuff.. thanks for the smiles.. :)
ReplyDeleteThanks so much Bunk! Generally speaking I've been sensing self preservation panic for a while now.
DeleteI'm glad you reported this accurately with no embellishment.
ReplyDeleteAwfully close to true Ed. Imagine. :)
DeleteThis is pretty much what passes as our GOV.
ReplyDeleteThey say it--no matter how it sounds or [comes out]-
the uninformed will swallow hook line and sinker.
I don't comment to be a know it all. Just trying to
share my 10 yrs. of research. How all this comes to be.
I should have been learning tile setting or auto mechanics-
something to make me a living > Windows DOS/Windows 95/98-
but I found some irregularities in the encyclopedia. "THE HUNT was ON"!
I found out that the main gang does societal manipulation,
just like Pirates;
(1) you heard it-but you didn't.
(2) you saw it-but you didn't.
(3) it was there-but it wasn't.
In the past there are so called "great men". But after some looking
not so great. Great for the Pirates. but for the good guys
(regular people)--- NOT SOMUCH.
The late 1800's seem to be just what we are experiencing.
These Commies just regroup and try to hammer the progressive agenda
again and with better technology.
The Wizard of OZ Book was a way to tell the masses not
to fall for this Commie SHIT!
Today We have the Interweb and it is almost a non effective means.
Looking in the encyclopedia -look up Fascism-then in the same subject
(maybe turn the page) Extreme Nationalism.
These Pirates will say; If only we could get rid of these conservatives,
Utopia could be achieved.
TsWs
Ts/Ws, It is all about control of the people, then they just do whatever the hell they want. Steal as much as they want. Run pedophile shops without fear of prosecution, you name it.
DeleteThey really do think of us as dirt people.
Kid, are you sure you aren't Joe Biden's speech writer? Good stuff. I agree with Adrienne, you could make a good living doing this sort of thing. I wonder what would happen if Biden sat down with Kim Ill-un. Wouldn't you love to hear that conversation?
ReplyDeleteThanks Mustang ! Hey - a Biden and Big Kim meet. Good idea for a future post :-)
DeleteIn honesty Joe gives me most of the content. I just add a little.
Today I read he called Chris Wallace "Chuck". hhaha
ReplyDeleteIt is hard to believe that the Democrats are rallying behind this senile old coot
It'll be interesting when we see how many DB.
DeleteDem voters will generally vote for a dead squirrel.
"Folks."
ReplyDeleteWhat an embarrassment and don't forget his championship of transdom. Yes, an embarrassing old fraud.
LSP - If they thought any decent number of voters supported raping and killing kids, they'd be trying to champion it.
DeleteLOLOLOL... tho It's getting harder to lampoon the guy and impossible to tell what is an actual outtake and what might be slightly embellished. And he has added on since this post! Who knows what he'll say before Super Thursday... I'll check back here at the Diary for all of my real news and gossip.
ReplyDeleteThanks Mr Blade ! It IS getting harder to outdo his statements but I will persevere.
DeleteNorm Crosby, known as the Master of Malaprop! What a wonderful blast from the past!
ReplyDeleteBTW, he is still living. I don't know if he's still doing stand up, though.
Thanks for that note AOW. Yea, it's Been a while from those days.
Delete