A Candid Conversation With President Donald J Trump

In a special interview with Kid, President Donald J Trump had these things to say.

Mr President, What about Paul Manafort being sent to Rikers.....

"If they send brave Paul Manafot to Rikers, I will send in SEAL Team 7 to break him out and put Bob Mueller and Crooked H. Clinton in his place.  After they break Paul out I'll have them take care of some business at CNN's headquarters around the world."

What about Chuck Schumer telling Mexico you are bluffing on Tariffs?

"Oh my, when I see Cryin Chuck Schumer he looks just like a little diseased rat.  I can't stand to be around him.  He also smells.   His fat ugly no talent daughter Amy apparently has the same mental disease as her daddy.  Amy should get married to Bette Midler and the two of them and Meghan McCain from that total loser show the View can have wild crazy Hate Trump sex parties all day just like Peter Strzok and Lisa Page were doing.  I may get SEAL Team 7 to meet Chuck in a dark alley one of these days just like I did with Hairy Reid and have them beat the crap out of him with a Boflex."

Well, what did you think of the Royal Family and your visit to the UK?

"The Queen was wonderful.  She had lots of "off color jokes" lets say. She wanted to spend the night with me, but there was no way to get away from Melania without being found out.  Prince Charles was very very very nice but I think he has some serious emotional issues.  I asked him why he married a skank like Camilla after being married to Diana.  He said she has some special talents.  I said well, she must... and we left it at that.

Most of the rest of the family walk around kind of snorting like pigs with bad colds and you really can't understand what they say so I just look at them and smile.  A lot of them have teeth that just go in all directions like a shark, and it looks like it makes it hard for them to speak plainly so I give them a pass.

I think they all adored me and Melania - or maybe that's Melania and me.  All the people I saw in England obviously love me. Believe me.  I hear some of them drove a thousand miles or more to be there.  All except that nasty Megan Markle.  I've never met her but I think she probably is nasty.  They say she said nasty things about me.  I don't care.  I don't care, I don't expect everyone to like me.  Whenever I saw Prince Harry though I just flipped him off.  I did that thing obama did on TV all the time where he pretended to rub under his eye with his middle finger.  As far as the fake news protests, I understand obama was driving around a bunch of punks in a bus to various locations to hold up some Soros signs and make us wonder what sort of vermin we're living with here.

Then there's that punk Mayor Kahn.  I think he's homosexual.  His muslim buddies should take him up on a tall building and toss him off.  The world would be a better place.  This I will tell you."

How do you feel about Nancy Pelosi and the freshmen democrat women in the House ?

"I think she represents the democrats very well.  She is very anti-American, a complete moron, can't speak in complete sentences just like the last president, and she's drunk all the time. Completely wasted.  The last time she was at the White House, I almost got drunk from the fumes.  But it is her and Lyin Paul Ryan's fault we don't have any sensible immigration laws. Believe me. Believe me.

Cortez is a college graduate? She couldn't pass a 2nd grade math test.  Let's not even talk about the other one.  No doubt her great great great, I don't know how many greats,  grandmother inspired the creation of the burka.  Kind of explains why muslim men have sex with goats."

What about your 2020 Election chances ?

"Oh Boy do you see that freak show of candidates they have ?  Alfred E Newman Mayor of nothing, a bunch of really nasty stupid women, Some idiot who thinks he is Spartacus and a bunch of people who couldn't get hired as Greeter at Walmart so they became politicians.  This is where most politicians come from btw, this I will tell you.  Fired from Walmart.  Walmart didn't even give creepy Joe Biden a chance at the job so he moved into politics after moving out of his parents basement at 23 and hasn't accomplished anything in all this time.  Imagine, a totally incompetent pedophile who's only accomplishment was keeping his nose in oabama's butt for 8 plus years happens to be at the top of the heap of the democrats candidates.

There is no question I will be elected and hopefully a lot of worthless Republicans in Congress will be replaced by Americans."

Finally, where do you feel we are on Foreign Policy Initiatives?

"We're kicking China's ass.  We're kicking Canada's ass.  Can you imagine they elected Justin Trudeau?  Maybe I should call him Justine, but I'll wait until the USMCA is in place.  I kind of feel sorry for him. Total loser.  Couldn't negotiate at a lemonade stand.  I think it's hard for him to figure out which pair of stupid looking socks he's going to put on in the morning. We're going to be kicking Mexico's ass. Iran?  The only bomb they get will be dropped on them.  Russia?  Lets not talk about Russia.  Very good friends of the USA is all I can tell you.  Once I get through the next election we can talk more about Russia.  The rest of the world?  Who cares really.

Oh, One other thing that happened "Inter" "Nationally" yesterday.  Last week I had the USS John McCain deployed to Vietnam just offshore of Hanoi.  That's in the Gulf of Tonkin.  Very troublesome place for America in the past.  Apparently when the bucket, the ship got there it broke down immediately.   It's been captured by the Vietnamese and is now being tortured.   They're sticking sharp wooden spikes into its gun barrels and playing Madonna music 24/7 below decks.  I understand the ship is telling them whatever they want to know.  When they're done with it, it will be renamed The Songbird and will be transferred to the NYC garbage hauling fleet as soon as someone is willing to tow it back here.

The crew has been put up in very nice hotels though and is being treated wonderfully.  In fact my great friend Kim Jong Un has sent an entire brigade of Comfort Womens Forces Personnel down there to well you know, provide additional comfort.  The LGBTQRSTUV community has also deployed to take care of any service member with special needs.  It's just wonderful isn't it?"

Isn't it time to bring in the exotic dancers?"

That it is Mr President !  Bring in the MAGA Girls !