The Liberal Explained

I think there are 4 basic types.

YOUNG IDEALISTS – Many of us were “liberals” when we were young, stupid, and poor enough to sometimes be willing to ‘hate the rich’ and therefore buy into all the evil corporation nonsense the liberals still get so much mileage from.  Let’s forget about this group and hope they come to their senses later on as 50-60 % of us do and become conservatives.

FANTASY.  Some people cannot deal with real life.  They simply have to spend all their thought time on pleasantness - flowers, world peace, happy playful animals (No, I’m not talking about you Bunni), eating good food, etc.  Conservatives do that; we just recognize the evil around us as well and are more than willing to deal with it.

Sheep and Sheepdogs.  Ok, not a biggie.  To some extent, that’s what we pay our money (taxes) for – to support a military and intelligence machine that lets’ us forget all that nastiness most of the time so we can focus on pleasant things.  Let’s forget about these folks too.

IGNORANCE.  These are people who are so blindingly stupid they actually believe that voting for non-democrats will result in their churches being burned to the ground and their children used for bad mitten.  (Wait: Aren’t conservatives all Religious people? Why would they burn churches?. Well, let’s not get caught up in the absurdity of the ignorant.)

SOCIOPATHS – Ah, here is the money group.  They prop up ‘minorities’ and anyone they perceive to be non-white good looking people (like myself and all of you of course) and classify them as victims.  This way they can be ‘for the little guy’ - the minority.  Effectively, this gives them a mechanism for them to say, on almost any occasion during the day, that ‘they care’.   They care for all these victims.  They need that.  They Need victims.  Sociopaths navigate life by pretending to be people with normal feelings.  Otherwise people would recognize them for the worthless self-absorbed bastards that they are and they’d have a tougher time stealing your money or whatever it is they need to self gratify.

Some real examples are

They support ‘the troops’.  They’ve never sent a cookie or even clicked through an e-card but they support the troops.  They don’t support the mission, therefore they don’t support the troops.  They apparently think ‘the troops’ are all suffering horrifically and toil all day for people and animals and humanity situations of dire consequence that they don’t care about.  The sociopath does not understand the mechanics of Non-sociopaths; compassion, empathy, willingness to work hard for someone else’s benefit.  The real victims.

How about the 9-11 ‘truthers’. According to them the dumbest man on the planet – George W Bush, planned and executed the most complex plan, using robot airplanes, ghost airline tickets, names of passengers that trace back to real people, recorded cell phone calls, etc. etc. on to infinity... to murder 2,973 people on the morning of 9-11-2001 just to Invade Iraq and ‘kill Saddammo for his daddy’.  And after 10 years, not a shred of evidence has appeared nor have any of the 10’s of thousands of people that would have been involved come forward to write a book and make a trillion freakin dollars.   Jumpin Friggin Catfish. 

Here is the point to that.  Never once did any of them say ‘George W Bush killed 3,000 people on 9-11”.  I’ve never heard them.  They only say that GW Bush ‘did 9-11’ for some clandestine purpose.  The 3,000 people that were murdered don’t mean shit to them.  Why.  In my opinion, it is because they don’t give a shit about real victims.  Those victims aren’t here anymore for them to point to and lie and say “I care about you”.  They also cannot allow themselves to believe that there are millions upon millions of Muslims out there that want them dead.  They don’t like confrontation.  Confrontation costs money.  Ah so what, some whack jobs murdered 3000 people.  WHAT BENEFIT DO I get out of spending money and resources tracking down some people and either killing them or putting them away.  To them, there is no value in following up with the Muslims.  It does Nothing for them personally.  Or this is how they think anyway.  Live for me and screw everyone else and their tomorrows.

That’s why morons like katie couric want to get muslims more involved in TV and pop culture so us Neanderthal Thinking Conservatives will see that these Vermin are actually Nice People.

Hey katie – move to freakin Iraq or anywhere else in the middle east and live like a woman there.  Then come back and tell us all your cute little bedtime stories you freakin moron.  Get a clitorectomy while you’re there to be in solidarity with the vermin you admire so much. 

I think I may have gotten a little off track here...

Finally, I don’t think many liberals even understand what liberal is.  Let me try.  A Liberal is someone who supports freedom for people to do whatever they want, be religious or not, support a clean environment for all and for all to be happy successful and at least afford middle class happy upwardly mobile lifestyle.  The liberal supports pretty much anything that doesn’t do harm to someone else and either elevates someone’s standard of living or helps the environment in which we live.

Did I describe you?  You’re not a liberal then, you’re a conservative.  I’m ultra-conservative and these are all things I support.

You’re only a sniveling, whining loser liberal progressive if you support having the government control as much of your life as is humanly possible and take as much money from those who spend their entire working life making sure you have the best products and services possible in order to give it to your worthless self-absorbed sociopathic ass.

I never read Ann Coulter’s book about liberals and victims.  If I plagiarized her, it was unintentional.  But Liberals and Victims.  Ok, I get it, don’t need to read a book.