Wednesday, January 24, 2018

Even More Breaking News

Military Times 

Breaking!  Army to replace majority of soldiers with transgender females.  

While undergoing the necessary surgical and hormonal treatments, DNA from Rosie O'Donnell, Joy Reid, and Kathy Griffin will be added.




4 Star Transgender General Duke "Katherine Scrappy Kitty"  Abrams tells us these will be the toughest meanest trannies to ever to hit the battlefield.  If they run out of bullets they'll be pulling hair, kicking shins, taking names, and threatening to move to another country.  Never mind she is in an Air Force uniform.  She doesn't like green, she likes blue.


Breaking News - 50,000 Lost text messages between FBI employees Peter Strzok and Lisa Page have been found and published by Wikileaks.  
Given that 50,000 text message over the course of 5 months amounts to 333 text messages per day on average, we found, as we expected, that many of the texts were made while Peter and Lisa were cheating on their respective spouses and having illicit sex with each other.  Some of the texts:   
Text Arrival tones are added for full effect.
Ding - Ooh Lisa it's been 10 minutes since we feasted on each other!,  Ding - Oh Peter take me now!,  Ding - Ooohh Yes!,  Ding - Aahhhhhhh, Ding - No Don't Stop You Silly Monkey!, Ding - I won't stop my fluffy bunny !, Ding - AhhAHhAhhAhhhh OoohOohhOhhh, Ding - Don't move now my beautiful wingless hen ! Ding - Take me now my Tiger.  Ding - I will take you and spank you just like I will spank that nasty Donald Trump the next time I see him.  Ding - Oh, you're making me so hot with your anti-Trump texts !! Oooh Ooooh OooOOOOOoooooh... (Moaning, groaning, and anti-Trump profanity for the next several hours.)

Breaking !  Chuck Schumer has managed to piss everyone off.  



The Dreamers have begun protesting at his house, the democrats are pissed that he caved and the rest of us have always regarded him as an asshole.

He can't stop crying now.  Nor will he be able to get any sleep.
I love me some Donald J Trump !

Sunday, January 21, 2018

Vincent Van Gogh Is Painting Clouds in Space.

I wondered what he was up to.

Click the picture then click again at the APOD site to get a high resolution version to explore in minute detail, or suffer the pangs of a blind date with Diane Feinstein.




Friday, January 19, 2018

In The News in The Year Of Our Lord 2018 on January 19th

Pentagon says that now that IS IS is now Was Was, we are focusing on the Russians and the Chinese.

James Mattis tells us that the Russins have excellent vodka and hookers and the
Chinese make an excellent hangover cure called Dim Sum.

Harvard Law School professor Lawrence Lessig says there’s still a scenario in which Hillary Clinton becomes president.  This is the kind of shit your kid is going into debt 100 grand to listen to.

A candidate for the Democratic presidential nomination himself, Mr. Lessig envisioned a 
scenario in which President Trump resigns or is impeached due to even the slightest Russia collusion connection to his campaign, then Vice President Mike Pence 
resigns or is impeached, and House Speaker Paul D. Ryan — who would be next 
in line — nominates Mrs. Clinton to be his vice president, and then steps aside to let her have the job.

If that isn't enough to prove the mental retardation of this Harvard professor, let's recognize that everyone on the face of the Earth is well aware of the rock solid evidence
of the clinton collusion with Russia in the 2016 campaign.
As well - let's realize that when democrats are squawking about Trump's potential physical health issues, we all know that security/medical people are dragging the clinton beast up steps or picking her up to toss her into her van to head to the next destination - probably Walmart 
for a few more cases of adult diapers.

Democrats fail in impeachment bid hours before shutdown.

A smallish collection of racist and insane democrat congresspersons has once again failed to get any support for initiating impeachment proceedings on the greatest president America has known in over 100 years.  They now demand cookies, ice cream, coloring books, play-doh and counselors to help them through this latest crisis.

Televangelist Kenneth Copeland thanks donors, Jesus for buying him a private jet.

Who in the hell sends a televangelist money.  Who? 
Folks, kneel beside your bed at night and thank God for all you have, then pray for what you don't and keep your money.


MLB players balk at proposed 18 minute pitch clock.

Major League pitchers are balking at a time restriction on when they must throw the next pitch.
Mets pitcher Mohammed Ali Achmed, El Newark complains "This is hardly enough time to give my nuts a good scratch and extract more camel fleas 
from my beard before I must throw ball again .  Praise be to allah".

Nana Pelosi calls GOP budget bill Doggy Doo.  Your last 2 heartbeats away from the Oval Office contender.

 Nana Pelosi, determined to avoid having anyone think she might be sane has gone off 
into another meaningless rant about things she knows nothing about.
In a related story from across the pond, UK;s Tory MP's apparently have little problem sending their secretaries out to shop for sex toys and have their MP's describe their breasts as 'sugar tits' without consequence..
"Oh how I wish we could do that here in America" exclaimed Nancy Pelosi.

New Director of the Consumer Financial Protection Thingamabob, Mr Mulvaney has sent in a SHOCKING budget request for 2018.

They are requesting $0.00.

Lots of Sports News !

Who gives a shit.

Trump to meet with British Prime Minister at Swiss Conference.

Big Sex Romp planned at secret Swiss Hotel.  Theresa May hopes President Trump will bring sex toys and give her a 
rousing spanking with a copy of the latest Forbes magazine.

Trump Travel cost taxpayers 13 million over the last year says watchkitty group.

At 13 mil a year that's about 104 million over 8 years.  Over 800 million less than the obama's spent on travel.  But don't let that derail your hate for Trump and "rich people".

Afghanistan tells USA  'Don't get your camels upset over a government shutdown.  We shutdown our government 16 years ago and it's still no big deal.

Self-explanatory (And stolen from Duffel Blog)

Yea, that convicted traitor bradley manning is running for Senate somewhere.

What will tomorrow's news bring?






Tuesday, January 16, 2018

Chain Migration - ExoPlanets - Sanctuary Cities - California

I read today that 8 Million will enter the USA via Chain Migration.  This year.

Eight Million.  That is 2.4 % of the population of the USA.  That is from 3 to 4 times the number of people in active military service.  That's insane !

These are people who just happen to be related to people who's name got picked out of a hat to come to America to live off of Welfare, Social Security and Medicare while planning terrorist mass murder attacks.

This is Nucking Futs.  That is just this year.  Imagine how many have already arrived here since Tricky Dicky Durbin invented the term Chain Migration, when he said he couldn't wait to import massive numbers of democrat voters from shithole countries.  Dicky Durbin is a racist against Americans.  Dicky was found crying his eyes out sobbing for no particular reason today on the steps of the Capitol building.

Exoplanets.  Forget about the friggin Exoplanets.  They are Trillions of miles away and we won't land on one for thousands of years. If Ever.  And if we do, it will contain viruses and other bacteriological threats to our systems that will kill any human that goes there in the first 2 or 3 seconds upon landing.  Forget this Crap !

Sanctuaries.  DHS Chief Kirstjen Nielsen is seeking to Charge Leaders of Sanctuary Cities.  Be Still My Heart !  Go Kirstjen !!!!  Made my Month to read this.

The Red Portion of California wants to secede from California and become New California - with its own government, economy, and everything else supportive of an individual state.  Then they want to break out the popcorn and wine, sit on the front porch and laugh at the blue portion of California that will quickly become 187 trillion in debt because they don't have any taxpayers left, just welfare queen illegal aliens.

Tape at 11.

Friday, January 5, 2018

A Complete List of Things Caused by Global Warming

Below is an image grab from the page you will go to by clicking on the image. 

Each of the items listed is a link to the story about how that item was affected by global warming.

Note that some of the links lead to pages that are no longer available but many still lead to active pages.

Hilarious.

These idiots are certifiable.  They should be confined to a sanitarium and given fake steering wheels to play with.